I used to be bad dealing with people.
I couldn’t say if others really enjoyed my presence.
Or if they just didn’t have anybody else to talk to.
So I got myself into a radical change. And I got into the best time of my life.
Here’s what I did. You can apply these tips today.
1. Be interested in other people
People love to talk about themselves.
So, give people the opportunity to talk about themselves.
They will immediately like you.
They will say “John is such a nice person!” just because you listened to their worries about their pet not being well or some other topic.
The key to people’s hearts is to show genuine interest in their lives.
Start by asking simple questions like: Do you like about your job? What hobbies do you have? Do you have family? What plans do you have for the weekend?
(My guest Ken talks about this in the video on team trust building.)
2. Thank you does magic
We all want to feel appreciated.
Not just for the work we do, but also for who we are as a person.
In fact, the reason why we want to do well in our job is because it gives us a good feeling about ourselves.
The easiest way you can show appreciation is by saying THANK YOU.
Showing gratitude for the contribution of those around you creates a positive feedback loop:
People will want to work for you. And they want to do an even better job.
3. Avoid negative topics
Avoid talking about negative stuff.
Whether it’s the high workload, climate change, politics, illness, terrorism or other stuff.
Talking constantly about negative topics will create an anchor in people’s minds.
They will think:
You = negative
Not good if your goal is to connect with more people.
4. Make compliments
Think back when somebody last complimented you for something: Your nice dress, a tasty meal you prepared or some fact you remembered without having to Google.
How did that make you feel?
I bet you felt great!
Do the same for other people.
You will be rewarded for your kindness.
5. Show high energy
Humans are programmed to feel attracted by people who exude high energy and physical fitness.
It’s an indicator for health and good genes.
So, working towards improving your physical appearance will automatically make you more attractive to others.
Start to work out on a regular basis, whether it’s by joining a gym or some other exercise like running every morning.
I can’t tell you how much physical exercise has changed my life. I used to be totally anti sports before. Now I go to the gym 2x per week and the positive impact is massive.
6. Be interesting
Become a fascinating person.
Have an interesting story to tell about a vacation to a foreign destination, about your family’s history or how you won the gold medal as a swimmer in junior high.